Unnecessary Leak.

It's not about...

Them and what they say or do to you, how they make you feel on the inside and out. Or what they think of you- good or bad. Often, it matters so much to most of us. We get tangled up in this web of thoughts because of them. And most often, it's not them who lets loose the strings and traps us but most often, it's us. It's us that chooses to play mind games with ourselves. Letting the voice in our heads speak louder than our heart. Hoping, that we'd triumph over the seas of negativity and reason out the possible unknowns. But often, yes often, we just falll to the ground. Defeated.

It's not about...

Me. How I feel. What I feel. Why I feel. That way. - good or bad. And it's definitely not about putting the blame on them. - good or bad.

It's all about...

Him and Him alone. Honouring Him. Putting Him above everything else. And even if we fall to the ground- defeated. His kindness and grace lifts us up.

Of course, we're who we're created to be. Human beings. Somehow that says it all. Everything happens for a reason and I choose to believe that I was put on this earth for a purpose, although still searching, and I might spend the rest of my life searching but at least I know I tried. Because sometimes, that's all that matters.

And so she thinks as she always do

Bit By Bit.

It's like feasting on something you absolutely adore. Like, grandma's roast turkey on Christmas Eve, your favourite flavoured ice cream topped with your favourite kind of toppings. For me, it's everything that would make the grey clouds hovering over my head dissipate. It won't last long, so I'll have to savour every bit of it. Bit by bit.

Wheee emo random senseless shamay baaack yall!

Ok ok, have to go paint my friend's nails! She has to a ball to go to tmr! ;)

Good Job.

My hands are so dry right now, it's pretty gross. :D

I guess this is what I do when I have so much on my to-do-list that instead of diligently ticking them off one by one, I just leave. Till the post-it has lost its sticky-ness. Till I reach the end of the line and realise that the equation has not been solved instead, it has become more complicated. Till I stop.

Like now, I should stop and seriously do some research for my 2000 word essay. I should stop and read up on my anatomy. I should stop and make full use of the time I have right now because I can't grab hold of this intangible substance, put it in a bottle and store it somewhere where it freezes.

You see, at this point you should already figured out that I really do not want to do any work. How lah! Lol.

OOO-EEE.

I'm using mac I'm using mac! :D :D

Ok, don't sound so jakun shamay yuen. (WHEE)

Sigh, I have a lecture in 10 minutes, an assignment due next monday, a quiz to accompany that week, another assignment due the following week and one hugeee butt one due in october which I have not started on.

There ya go, one sentence to sum everything up. If only I could.

sigh. take care all.

Hold My Hand.

Christina,

I could promise to hold and cherrish you all the days of my life,
I could promise to be with you in sickness and in health,
I could vow, till death do us part. But I won't.

These vows are for the optimistics and hopeful ones. I, on my marriage day am not optimistic. I am not hopeful. I am sure and steady. I am a hard man. I can tear someone apart and put the pieces back together.

I am sure, that you are my lover, my best friend, my partner. My heart. My heart. Beats for you. And I promise to lay my hearts in your hands.

*at least it went something like that.*